Memory Lane, and Ramen Noodles

I think Ramen noodles are a primary food source for soldiers, and perhaps, college students. But I've never done a study on it.

Back in my days as a Military Police Officer I would keep a constant supply of Ramen available for those days when I was either: broke, lazy, or broke and lazy. It's cheap and easy to make, not to mention it's not the worst thing you could be eating.

It was the end of August 1997, and I was roughly three months removed from Basic Combat Training. All summer our unit had been sending a 3 man team to patrol the Lake Ozark Recreational Area (LORA). LORA is an area away from the military installation where you could go to fish, boat, jet ski, or just relax in general. As Military Police Officer's there was always some confusion as to what are real authority was up there. Were we on military property? Did we have the same powers that we have on Post? Nobody could really give us definitive answers, but really all we were there for was to create a presence, keep the peace , and call for civilian backup if necessary.

As it turns out, our platoon was assigned the duty for the week leading up to, and the weekend of Labor Day. I've been angling for this assignment from the first day I had heard about it. As an 18 year old male, who wouldn't want to experience something like Party Cove?

So of course I draw the last weekend of the season. Send the new guy when the weather has turned cold and the bikinis are put away until next year. My experience at LORA initially included a lot of Playstation games and eating Ramen noodles. Our first day at LORA was great. The temps were in the middle 70's and the sun was shining. I woke up the next day and it was about 35 degrees and raining. It stayed like that the rest of the week.

Typically when the weather changes that quickly, I seem to catch a cold or some other ailment, and this particular week was no exeption. It started out with some mild aches and pains and progressed into severe headaches and the inability to keep any food down. My diet consisted of water and Ramen noodles. Each day I'd spend less and less time awake, and more time laying in bed praying for a meteor to land on me. I figured I was getting the flu. Being a good soldier, I toughed it out the best I could.

When our duty was over we arrived back on Post and turned in our gear - and I immediately went back to the barracks to get some rest. Each day I felt darker and darker, like something was covering me from head to toe. I had never been that sick before and something just didn't feel right. I literally felt like I was dying from within. The next morning my roommate took me to the hospital and I was given a series of mobility and dexterity tests, and I failed each one miserably, all the while the doctor is giving me no feedback and only muttering to himself.

The doctor left the room for a little while and came back with a mask for me to wear. I asked him if he knew what was wrong with me, and he said he didn't know. I asked him if I was going to die, and he said he didn't know. I'm nearly having a panick attack now and I'm not accepting "I don't know" for an answer, so he tells me you may have menengitis.

I should've kept my mouth shut. I should've never asked. When my younger brother was 6 months old, he contracted menengitis and nearly died from it. I've been living with the symptoms for a good 7 days now and I'm thinking I'll be dead at any moment. I was wheeled to the Emergency Room because apparently the only person capable of doing a spinal tap was working down there that particular day.

I'm not sure if any of you have had a spinal tap or not, but I'm here to tell you it's a very painful experience. Since it's par for the course, I received the daily double - the local anaesthetic I was given didn't work and the Doctor performing the procedure was leading an intern field trip, so I had about 20 people watching. I have absolutely no problem admitting that I cried like a little baby the entire time, and I nearly squeezed my Squad Leader's hand into a ball of mush.

As it turns out I had contracted Viral Menengitis, not Bacterial Menengitis and I would live. I also never got around to going to the hospital until I was beyond the worst of it and made a pretty quick recovery.

The point of this story is that I haven't had Ramen noodles since, and I never will. Every time I think about eating them, or see anyone else eating them I start to get a headache and backache all at the same time. Irrational? Yes, but it's my thing.